Wake Up Call

Recently an uncle of mine presented me with too handsome a cash amount as a gift for my success in probably one of the (if not THE) toughest examinations around. Needless to say that this gesture of his warmed the cockles of my heart but it also forced me to acknowledge that yes, maybe I have achieved something really big.

So as I (nearly) stand vindicated in my professional life, my personal life and ways are anything but acceptable or so I'm informed by my ever so clairvoyant uncle. Few of his futuristic warnings were scary indeed: "your ways though beneficial thus far, cannot be changed overnight like you believe.. you run the risk of distancing youself from your near and dear ones with the possibility of becoming insensitive (the worst thing ever)... accumulation of such layers can lead to such unhappiness.. you may not realise it but it amounts to you digging your own grave.."

He signed off by enlightening me with a three step process to HAPPINESS: COMPASSION, AFFECTION and then LOVE.

Simple enough I was tempted to think but boy was I wrong or what. For the past few days, I have been subjected to the toughest personal challenge ever, that of being an AGONY AUNT. Let me state for the record that I have played that role oh so many times before for my dear friends from both the sexes alike. In fact I often kid around by saying, "always a bride's maid but never a bride eh..".

But what is particularly challenging this time around is the fact that the poor girl happens to be a stranger! I have never seen the boy in question and honestly, I DON"T CARE about either one of them. This, I feel is an acid test for ME. So, as the poor girl comes up with ingenious ways to grab my attention, I'm left struggling to keep myself away from the old beaten track of NOT CARING.

Sharing whatever I know about relationships, she particularly liked when I repeated what Oprah Winfrey had said in one of her shows: if you know what you want and you're not getting it, MOVE ON. I believe all she really needs is someone to lend an ear which I guess I can provide.. with compassion mind you. God only knows how tough it is for me when I have to put away 'To Cut a Long Story Short' (a three-old gift from my dad that I can finally spare the time to read now) to listen to, "you know he's... but you see... so what should I do now... I feel..."

I wonder what makes her share all her deep thoughts with me. I kinda appreciate it in a way but nonetheless, what makes me not like her is the fact that she cares to spend all this time talking about him when her final examination is on the very next day! And to think she aspires to be where I am right now!

My lack of practical knowledge in this specialized field of human behaviour has fairly recently led me to formulate a resolution: to not be judgmental about (read critical of) the "people in love" as apparently I don't know squat about anything even remotely connected to it anyway and whatever passing theoretical information that I do possess (chiefly through self effort) will not really inspire much confidence in the privileged majority (or the unprivileged minority, you decide).

So the female just called me to ask what her next step should be.. how should I tell her that I'm just as CLUELESS as she is if not more!