Early Days

We all need sustenance, organic and intellectual alike, to get up each morning and face the world. As I eat only to live, needless to say that the other mode of survival interests me more. Books and songs have invariably satisfied this appetite of mine since as long as I can remember. I strongly believe that solitude is one essential pre-requisite to savour the enormous wealth inscribed in them.

It is only when I'm alone do I FEEL SO MUCH... with thoughts flooding my hyperactive mind as I wave goodbye to each moment as it passes me by. It is amazing how much the words that I read or hear, ring true. In stark contrast to this is my public life. I cannot help but detect a tinge of superficiality in it as I more often than not, do not say or talk about what I really want to and would have if I were with "them".

They say excess of everything is bad and I can't even begin to count my lucky stars as my current base camp allows me to just about strike a perfect balance between the two 'world's apart' states of being.

So, after a day's work (which includes about two hours of class and intervening hours of banter), I turn to the 'elevating stuff'. I begin with literature on 'falling in love' (and understandebly so) in 'The Road Less Travelled' by M. Scott Peck.

... our use of the word "love" is so generalized and unspecific as to severly interfere with our understanding of love.

The person who truly loves does so because of a decision to love.
It is easy and not at all unpleasant to find evidence of love in one's feelings. It may be difficult and painful to search for evidence of love in one's actions.

When we extend ourselves (a pre-requisite to love), our self enters new and unfamiliar territory, so to speak. Our self becomes a new and different seld. We do things we are not accustomed to do. We change.

Mutual loving confrontation is a significant part of all successful and meaningful human relationships.

.. come to recognize that each of you has your own separate destiny to fulfill.

Genuine love not only respects the individuality of the other but actually seeks to cultivate it, even at the risk of separation or loss.

I would not call my friends friends were they to withhold from me the honesty of their disappoval and their loving concern as to the wisdom and safety of the directions of my own journey.


As I make my way through this maze, I think of Maria (Eleven Minutes - Paulo Coelho) and I know that she is waiting for me (or rather it's the other way round).

Our experiences have been different, but we are both desperate people; the only thing that brings us any peace is being together.

Although we didn't take our clothes off and I didn't come inside you, or even touch you, we've made love.

Wait.. I've learnt that waiting is the most difficult bit, and I want to get used to the feeling, knowing that you're with me, even when you're not by my side.

Profound desire, true desire is the desire to be close to someone.

Scout calling her father by his name Atticus (To Kill a Mocking Bird - Harper Lee) reminds me of the fact that I call my progenitor Vashisht.

Being a stickler myself, Lynne Truss (Eats, Shoots and Leaves) is a goddess. Don't believe in carrying a permanent marker but nonetheless, have always made mental corrections whenever confronted with gross violations of the saddest kind in grammar (verbal and written alike).

Finally, Edward deBono (Lateral Thinking) makes so much sense.

Finely sprinkled in between is the dosage of the jargon that I wish to master soon.

How the day ends is equally important as how it starts and that is when I turn to music and even that reminds me of something or rather someone!


So here we stand
In our secret place
With a sound of the crowd so far away
And you take my hand
And it feels like home
We both understand
It's where we belong
So how do I say?
Do I say goodbye?
We both have our dreams we both wanna fly.
So let's take tonight to carry us through the lonely times.

I'll always look back as I walk away,
this memory will last for eternity.
And all of our tears will be lost in the rain when I've found my way back to your arms again,
But until that day you know you are the queen of my heart.

So let's take tonight and never let go while dancing we'll kiss like there's no tomorrow.
As the stars sparkle down like a diamond ring, I'll treasure this moment till we meet again.
But no matter how far or where you may be, just close my eyes and you're in my dreams. And there you will be until we meet.
No matter how many years it takes, I'll give it all to you.

Queen of My Heart - Westlife


Duplex communication:

Baby won't you tell me why there is sadness in your eyes,
I don't wanna say goodbye to you.
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head.

You're the one who set it up now you're the one to make it stop,
I'm the one who's feeling lost right now.
Now you want me to forget every little thing you said
But there is something left in my head.

I won't forget the way you're kissing,
the feelings so strong were lasting for so long.
But I'm not the man your heart is missing
That's why you go away I know.

You were never satisfied no matter how I tried
now you wanna say goodbye to me.
Love is one big illusion I should try to forget
But there is something left in my head.

Sitting here all alone in the middle of nowhere
Don't know which way to go.
There is so much to say now between us.
There ain't so much for you and
there ain't so much for me anymore.

In life, God doesn't give you people you want. Instead, he gives you people you NEED - to teach you, to hurt you, to love you, to guide you and to make you exactly the way he wants you to be - The BEST.

As the year comes to an end, I take time to thank the special people who touched my life... thoughtful friends and special people who have shown concern and made life more meaningful... THANK YOU..

Coincidence decides who you meet in life, your heart decides whom you want to stay in your life but it's only your destiny which decides who gets to stay in your life!